All Are Equal in the Eyes of Blog

So...

I have decided that from now on all my email subject lines will read like headlines:
"Husband Wants Stew for Supper"
"Musician Announces New Gig"
"Blogging Levels the Social Playing Field"

...this last one was written to my wife Jen when I discovered that a certain Mr. Rick Mercer has his own blog, and seems to keep it fairly regularly updated. Wild. It's not a even a particularly well-put-together blog, but it is definitely his, it's smart and sassy, and it even has en email address for him. I found this out by Googling "Rick Mercer for Prime Minister," which I think more and more is the best idea ever.

In fact, I think I may spoil my ballot.

Why the hell should I vote Conservative just because the Liberals have screwed up? If anything, I think ther Liberals should be forced to stay in office to clean up their mess. We all get better at things when we've had a chance to really learn from our mistakes; that's not even Grace, really - it's more like a form os Justice. What are we teaching our politicians by letting them throw out anyone who screws up? Sets quite the precedent. We may have a system that's better than the US's two-party deal, but we don't really have choices... the NDP are the only other ones even close, and we all know they'll never get into office... not that I particularly want Jack Layton as Prime Minister anyway.

So I think Rick Mercer should run as an independent... or maybe start the Citizens' Party of Canada, and we should all vote for him. I'm going to start by making one T-Shirt and wearing it to my next gig.

Next, instead of spoiling my ballot, I'll be doing some research about how to get Rick on the ballot for the new year. I'm looking through some Elections Canada stuff, and I'll get back to you soon...

floating in the ether

was in a haze till about 10:30 this morning, when I had my first cup of coffee, so I can't remember what got me thinking about Cuban cum Canadian trumpeter Alexis Baro, but I found this article.

...I remember the day Alexis Baro arrived from Cuba. My quintet, Outside the Lines, was playing at the Gorilla Monsoon on Queen St in Toronto, where I was working. We were finishing up for the night and this kid with his trumpet sort of quietly asked if he could sit in for a tune, and we said sure. I blew first, and then he did. It was unbelievable. He blew me right off the stage and through the back door. He was SO fiery and had such amazing chops. almost gave up playing right then and there.

So I don't know if I have what it takes to make it in music. This'll sound absurd to anyone who knows me, but I don't think I work hard enough. I'm not doing enough music for it to stick. See that part of the article where it says that those guys quit jobs that were getting in the way of their music? That's a luxury I simply don't have... mortgage, bills, line of credit... what the hell am I going to do with my life?

And having a very hard time getting my diploma from Humber, let alone my degree... seems they're missing grades that at one point they were not, and I don't know how to deal with that. They also just recently said they didn't know whether all my courses @ Mac and York would necessarily cover the requisite GenEds @ Humber, which at one stage I was assured would not be a problem... so I'm pretty exasperated by all that. What happens if I can't get my degree? Will I be stuck in plebian jobs the rest of my life? Are there not music jobs akin to working as a consultant for Sun Life or recruiting for an Engineering Staffing Company? There must be, but I have no idea what they are... retail? sucks. working for a big label? sellout. working for a little label? no security, no benefits... argh.

robbery & the human condition

so I may or may not have left my car door unlocked last night - hard to tell, because I have done so before (I've also left the lights on numerous times) - but when I left the house to go to work this morning I discovered that the driver's side door was indeed unlocked and that all of my tapes were gone. all but two actually: an irreplaceable live BNL tape, and the Rheostatics' Whale Music, of which , ironically, I think I have maybe two other copies. There was a Don Cherry tape, a Roy Hargrove one, Clifford Brown, Art Farmer, Miles Davis, U2, Fun For Malakai (damn. that one was irreplaceable too)... and a bunch that Bill Rowat taped for me my first couple years in highschool when I was first getting interested in jazz.

So what the hell? totally feel violated and robbed and bullied. called the police right away, who of course cannot do anything, and simply won't go searching for a bunch of missing cassettes...! that seems to be all they took, too: ownership and registration are still there (I think... afraid to open the little booklet I keep them in to check), mapbook is still there, neither the full cup of cold tea nor the reserve brake fluid has not been poured out into the car, the trunk wasn't popped, the ignition wasn't tampered with, the lights weren't left on (though the right turn signal was... that could've been me, mind you)... all that seems to have happened is that they took the tapes. Who the hell steals tapes, and why?

the main problem is the end result: at the best of times I think people are difficult, shameless, and self-centered. At the worst, I think they're worthless, useless, and fit to be done away with. I often get the urge either to hermit myself away or to move far away from all human contact - like really really far north or something - so this really just feeds that idea: People are bad. we just are. we all act like children in a sandbox, and our worldview is tiny and narrow and uncompromising. We are innately selfish and self-serving. It's no wonder the world is such a fucked up place, honestly. In the end everyone is only looking out for his or her own interests.

I had this funny debate with a friend of mine a few years ago about whether or not there was such a thing as "true" altruism - where the person doing the good thing really gets nothing out of it - and the answer was no. Even a mother dying to save her child is doing so out of self-interest: survival of the genetic line. I had a very hard time accepting this, mostly because I wanted to be right, but it does fit my world view quite well. People are shitheads. Even the Bible backs me up on this one: Psalm 53:3 says, "Everyone has turned away, they have together become corrupt; there is no one who does good, not even one" (echoed by Paul in Romans 3). And I must remember to include myself in this and not feel self-righteous: I may not have broken into someone's car, but I do tons of stuff that bulks me into this all-encompassing group. It just feels like there's very little that can be done about the human condition, even when we have Christ interceding on our behalf to God.